Extra, Extra
Extra, Extra
Extra, Extra
Extra, Extra
Early Addition
A follow up to a question from last week about cheating on the internet:
MSNBC/Elle Magazine recently did a survey about women using the internet, with particular attention to their habits in terms of online dating. It's probably not a surprise that the number of people who are checking out internet personals has increased exponentially in recent years.
We're not sure if this is a surprise, either, but according to the survey, men and women have slightly different perceptions about flirting and cheating with people they've met on the internet:
But not everyone is basking in the digital afterglow -- 24 percent of women worry that their partner's online encounter will turn into an affair. And they should be worried since 29 percent of guys admit they go online intending to cheat. Meanwhile, 10 percent of women and 19 percent of men say they are single or available when they aren't.
Furthermore, "32 percent of women and 13 percent of men consider their partner's online habits to be cheating."
A number of you responded to the original post that you had, in fact, caught your SO cheating on the internet. This doesn't mean that you should be paranoid, though. Ask Gothamist recommends keeping the lines of communication open with your partner. Well, unless you're the cheater. (Kidding!)
We think it's interesting how the internet is shaping the way relationships work. Above all else, people are finding soulmates on the internet, and online personals don't have the same stigma they once did, creating a new myriad of unique dating problems.
add to digg
add to stumble upon
add to reddit
email this
add to facebook
add to del.icio.us
Internet cheating and dating seems to me like a mishmash of ill-paired topics. The Internet facilitates communication, setting aside other psychology issues. Many articles try to address certain issues through stating people do things online that they wouldn't do in real life, but I think that's a badly formed argument.
People also do things on cellphones that they hadn't regularly done before because the mobile phone network facilitates communication. That doesn't make it less real, it doesn't change people's morals or desires, and it doesn't make electronic communication networks otherworldly or immoral. I like to say that it lets good people do more good things, and bad people do more bad things.
That said, cheating statistics are always surprising. I think cheating is a cowardly act, in as much that one feels that they need to deceive and disrespect to maintain a lifestyle. It's not as if there are more of them now because of the Internet, it's that individuals who previously didn't act upon their immoral urges are now finding easier ways to carry out their true intentions. The surprise is that there's so many of them out there.
The surge in online dating, however, is no surprise. Many think that the after-work bar scene is the worst place to meet people and that anything else would be better. Online social networks are working hard to fill that gap, and it's paying off. There's still plenty of room for growth, too. Maybe it's not the smoking ban that's bad for business... heh.
I think what the Internet does do is bypass a lot of other social cues and help create a sense of intimacy, real or not, between friends. And this may be where emotional cheating comes in.
I understand your point - I agree that things such as body languange and tone of voice do not come across in online communication, and the various popular forms of most online communication does not provide as rich of a set of forms of expression as face to face contact can provide. So, in some ways, it does offer unique possibilities. And people should be cautious of rapidly-established intimacy online. (I am quite cautious of it through experience)
Still, if you're in a committed monogamous relationship, you have to respect that committment and reject intimacy from people other than the one to whom you are committed. The media over which other intimacy exists is irrelevant. Simply because it takes less effort and time to be flirty over the Internet doesn't make it excusable to say and think things that would be wrong in any scenario.
I want to inform women on the internet there is a trucker that lives in Pa. He finds women off the net goes to there homes and tells them lies and lies to their children. He tells the women he loves them and their children. He says he wants to move in with you and get a job. He is married; he has no money and does not own a thing. He drives over the road to PA,WV,OH,IN,ILL,WS,MN. He tries to find women on his traveling time. He lies every thing that comes out of his mouth, he is usually having sex with up to twelve women at a time. He says he is not with anyone else but he lies to everyone. He has major issues to deal with and affects people every where that he goes. So watch out for the men that you chat with on the internet. There are a lot of lies out there and the love to eat you right up with them.
http://groups.msn.com/Peterbilt1988/butchsfriends.msnw?action=ShowPhoto&PhotoID=7
Thumpme21 Hit the Nail on the head this trucker is bad news to all the women who let me on the net come to there homes and play games with your life and your childrens lives his has a family at home and has NO time for them he has been with way more then just 12 women he is a walking time bomb so beware if you dont want to catch anything lord knows what this so called man has it sure isnt money or even love he doesnt know how to love or even show love love to him is sex he is just a player with god knows what he once told someone he doesnt care what he has he rather die and never know so look out lady`s if you care anything about yourself