The Vegan Guy

I've just begin seeing thus guy, and he seems great. Our chemistry is fantastic, he's gainfully employed (which I find refreshing having just dated a string of unemployed NYC men), and he's sweeter than sweet. There is something about him that bothers me, though, is that he's vegan. When we dine out, he has all of these high-maintenance food specifications, and when we eat together, I (a lifelong, fully committed carnivore) wind up feeling terribly unhealthy next to him. I'm so irked by his veganism, I'm not sure I can continue dating him. Is this absolutely ridiculous of me? Should I just be happy that I'm finally not the one paying for meals?
Hannah, Park Slope

Any time there is a significant disparity in two individuals' eating styles, it can cause one or both parties to feel disturbed. Usually we hear men complaining about how their dates don't seem to want to munch on anything but lettuce, but in your case, you're the one fully enjoying your burgers--as well you should be! Try not and let his way of eating make you feel bad about yours. You should continue to eat what you normally would, rather than something that compliments his meal but compromises your enjoyment of yours.

Perhaps you can view his dining style in such a way that you can appreciate it and learn from it some perhaps healthier ways of eating. Or you can look up some vegan restaurants (yes, they do exist!) in NYC by way of Zagat's or other restaurant guides and surprise your man with a date at a new venue for both of you. At least you know he'll pick up the tab!

Contact the author of this article or email tips@gothamist.com with further questions, comments or tips.

April 14, 2004 3:25 PM

Comments [rss]

jen

dude, dating a vegan rules. i did it once, and i learned how to cook all sorts of awesome things. of course, it helped that i hated cheese & eggs before i met him, and i'm not all that keen on meat (though i do enjoy a nice steak here and there, i can also make myself ill thinking about exactly what part of a chicken it is i'm eating...)

oh, so, yeah. unless he's making you feel bad about eating dead animals everytime you eat with him, dumping him cos he's a vegan is uber-lame.

in addish, vegan food is usually more varied and flavorful than your typical meat & potatoes. try it, you'll like it!

jake

i like vegans- for instance, my friend pete rojas of engadget fame is a vegan, and he always eats the most interesting foods. of course, i hate vegetables, so we rarely eat dinner together.

non-carnivore

unless your bo is calling you a sinner for the chicken wings you just downed, own your eating habits. if he's not telling you how to eat, then what eats at you is your own guilt. it has very little to do with him, but it would suck for him if your guilt ended what seems like a great relationship. get a grip!