Candice Holmes, Recent Grad/Temp

The Basics
Age and occupation. How long have you lived here, where did you come from, and where do you live now?
I am newly 23 and a professional job seeker/resigned neo-slacker/minor scenestress. I was born and raised in Brooklyn and so were my parents. My grandparents were from the South. There were four years spent in the woods of Connecticut and four months in D.C., but that was all school related. Now, I dwell in the lovely environs of Jamaica, Queens.

Play Threebird
1. You're a somewhat recent grad of Wesleyan -- a school known for being the crazy pseudo-hippie wannabe Ivy that the Times loves to place in "bankers, do you know what your kids are up to at their ridiculously over-priced school?" pieces -- so, just what the hell were you up to?
At Wesleyan, I was an English and Sociology major. My college experience was pretty tame in comparison to some of my friends. I rode the middle ground between being a saint and a lunatic. Drinking was my only vice. I did the Naked Party twice, on both occasions, stone cold sober -- once in freshman year when I ran out semi-hysterical because I naively thought it was just a theme and again, junior year because my friends lived in the house across the street and I was frankly just bored enough to get naked. Yet not do anything really fun. For all our crazy exploits at Wes, most of us are quite repressed. I've made up for it back here in town though.

2. Sorry to hear you're unemployed. Have you ever been on a job interview and imagined the other person being Barbara Walters just so you could break into some sympathetic sobbing?
Oh believe me, I've considered it. I've definitely got my inner drama queen screaming, "Please, oh please, hire me! I still live at home almost a year out of college and I've got college debt to my eyeballs. I'm dead broke, man, and I need benefits!" But, of course, that probably wouldn't get much sympathy because who doesn't have a sob story about now? I'd probably be better off promising to trade gossip gathered in the past year of freelancing and night adventures for a job. I've got some good stuff.

3. I have answers for this from a Manhattanite and Staten Islander. Now it’s your turn to represent as a Brooklyn native. What’s your quick take on the following?
Manhattan: Not as fabulous as it thinks it is, but still pretty fucking good
Queens: Fake suburb yet beautifully diverse
Bronx: Fuck those hills
Staten Island: Trade it for Ellis Island
Jersey: Some of my best friends are from there. Poor things.
Connecticut (since you went to school there): A lot more ghetto than
you might think, but it's like Riverdale in relation to NYC's The Bronx.

Proust-Krucoff Questionnaire
9pm, Wednesday night - what are you doing?
Sitting in front of my TV and computer, watching The O.C. and wishing the character of Marissa would just die already.

What's your New York motto?
Excelsior. What my tattoo would say if I ever got one of those. One of the few things I can translate from Latin after 5 years of that in high school (I went to one of those 6-year magnet deals.) Also the state motto, FYI.

Best celebrity sighting in New York, or personal experience with one if you're that type.
I'm actually notorious among my friends for having sightings. I almost stepped on Liev Schreiber's miniature dog a few years back because I was too busy talking on my cell phone to watch where I was going. Whoops! While singing with my HS chorus at a Knick game years ago, I was standing directly in front of Spike Lee, who looked bored as shit. Apparently, our natural anthem wasn't peppy enough. Anthony Edwards stopped me from getting flattened by a door at a movie premiere, when I was struggling to go in, hold the door, and close my umbrella all at once. I insulted Nigel Barker from America's Next Top Model at a party, clumsily trying to say that he looks great in person while saying that he looked old on TV. He snitted "I am old" and turned away. But, the encounter that I'm almost embarassed to admit was when I ran into Richard Grieco filming something on Sixth Avenue. I went totally apeshit, a step down from screaming hysterically but I was on the inside. I yelled out to him "Oh my God, it's you!" and went total fangirl as I asked to shake his hand and said I loved his work. I'm quite the bad TV connoisseur and I loved him in 21 Jump Street/Booker and Marker. Though I'm probably one of the few people under the age of 25 who remembers Marker and perhaps one of the 10 in general that ever watched it.

Describe that low, low moment when you thought you just might have to leave NYC for good.
Unfortunately, I have that moment just about every week. The job market is horrendous. If I wasn't from here, I would've had to have left a long time ago. Surviving in NYC is definitely a trial by fire thing. "If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere" is not just a song lyric.

What was your best dining experience in NYC?
Hands down Green Field. I am unashamedly a carnivore, which was almost a liability up at Wes where a good vocal chunk of the student body are...umm, crunchy fucking hippies. I had to hoarde the meat they would rarely sell in Weshop and my freezer looked like the meat aisle of the supermarket or something. Anyways, going to Green Field is like making a pilgrimage to Meat Mecca. Yummy Brazilian BBQ goodness. My family and I try to make it there for all special occasions and just talking about it makes us really excited.

Just how much do you really love New York?
I love New York so much that I give the right directions to tourists. So they can get to where the hell they're going and get the hell out that much sooner.