The title on Slate's main page for Virginia Heffernan's article was "How to date a has-been." Hoping for some tactical advice about relationships, Gothamist eagerly clicked through - only to see the piece was about E!'s plebe-gets-to-date-celebrity-of-yesterday show, Star Dates. Damn. But the article is pretty funny: Heffernan seems very protective of Fred Berry ("Hey hey hey!" Rerun from What's Happening! AND What's Happening Now!) and Jimmie Walker.
Damn again! Gothamist looked to see who we'd be compatible with...and it's Cousin Oliver from the Brady Bunch!





Mein Gott! I thought that was Harry Knowles for half a minute. What do you think Cousin Oliver did this time to land himself in an orange jail jumpsuit?
Killing Tiger the dog? I dunno. Saying "She sells seashells by the seashore" one too many times and getting in a bar brawl?
How funny -- Cousin Oliver is the only "celebrity" that I've ever had an extended conversation with --saw him at an after party at a Morphine concert.
I blathered on and on to him about how I related to him b/c I was an only child and I had a family of 9 cousins..
He was VERY nice about it. Remember him talking about his band. Not sure about dating him, however..